Such relational postures seem acceptable because very ofthen a person can be self-deceived into thinking and feeling that “I had suffered the greater wrong, and was showing a noble character by being ‘patient in suffering’.”
What makes being passive-aggressive a vice, however, is inside,we secretly grow angry, nursing perceived wounds, feeding resentment, and deriving hope and promise from the prospect that the other person will someday get what’s coming to him.
He goes on to show how this is ultimately a failure of love that we are called to as Christians.
Quoting,1 Corinthians 13, he says, genuine love “keeps no record of wrongs” (v. 5). Genuine love forgives and refuses to harbor resentment. "It no longer camps on actual or perceived insults and injuries."
Check out the whole article to read about the true cruciform posture that invites resurrection power accompanied by the restoration and renewing power of God’s Spirit.